Loving yourself unconditionally is an ongoing process and commitment. We live in a world that often pushes the idea that who we are is not good enough. We often feel we are in constant competition with others, which always leaves us feeling like we are falling behind. There always appear to be someone smarter, prettier, thinner, or more successful than you.

This completive climate makes it hard to love yourself just as you are now. Loving yourself unconditionally is a practice, something that can be cultivated over time. The only place you can begin to love yourself unconditionally is where you are right now. Remember also that even if you can accept and love yourself right now it does not mean you stop growing. You still set goals, but you do it with love as fuel, not shame and guilt.

Here are some practices and tips that can help you love yourself unconditionally. Remember this is a practice, and it a journey. Commit to opening the door to loving each part of you, even the parts that are not so excited about this process. All parts of you deserve your love and understanding.

5 Tips That Can Help You Love Yourself Unconditionally

1. Connect to Your Inner Self

This implies taking time for self-care. This can be through self-reflection, journaling, and meditation. It involves checking in with yourself each day to make contact with your inner world. To develop a deeper connection and understanding of yourself including your feelings, emotions, likes dislikes, etc. We can get so caught up in the external world, but to love yourself unconditionally you need to take the time to connect to your inner world.

2. Self-Acceptance

As you develop a deeper understanding of yourself, you can begin to get to know and accept all parts of yourself. To love yourself unconditionally, you have to accept yourself just as you are now, not how you want to be. This can be difficult, we often push ourselves to be thinner, smarter, better, etc. We might even tell ourselves that we can only accept ourselves when we have accomplished certain goals. Unconditional love though starts with acceptance and compassion now, even if it is not where you might want to be. You can only start from where you are, and the more you can accept where you are the easier it is to progress and grow.

3.Develop Self-Compassion

This is the practice of speaking to yourself internally like you would someone you loved. Many of us are run by a strong internal critic that can get in the way of us feeling like we can love ourselves unconditionally. Self-compassion is a practice where you can begin to work with the internal critic to help it become a kinder internal motivator for achievement. Remember, your inner critic needs love too, part of loving yourself unconditionally is starting to understand your inner critic and treating it with love and compassion too.

4.Heal Old Wounds

Heal Old Wounds: Taking the time to unpack and heal old wounds is an act of self-love. Being willing to go to the pain, hurt, and scars that might be in your system takes courage and is an act of true love. It can be helpful to have a mentor, coach, or therapist help bring light to these dark places so they can be released and healed. This work cannot be done completely on your own, so don’t feel like you have to. Letting other people in and being vulnerable is another act of unconditional love. Researcher Kristen Neff has several resources that can help you develop great self-compassion.

5.Healthy Relationships

 When you unconditionally love yourself, you are drawn to those that help reflect that love to you. Creating healthy boundaries and being able to communicate your needs is also an act of unconditional love because it shows you are showing up for yourself and creating safe environments to live in. You may find that some of your family or friends do not align with your passions, values, or goals, and this is okay. You do not have to reject them. You may find that you are spending more time with those who you feel more appreciated by and who are in alignment with who you want to become.

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